Domestic Violence Safety Plan Step 1
If I decide to leave, I will __________________________. (Practice how to get out safely. What doors, windows, elevators, stairwells or fire escapes would you use?)
I can keep my purse and car keys ready and put them _________________________ (place) in order to leave quickly. (Often good to get a spare set of keys made)
I can tell _______________________about the violence and request they call the police if they hear suspicious noises coming from my house.
I can teach my children how to use the telephone to contact the police and the fire department.
I will use _______________________________________as my code for my children or my friends so they can call for help.
If I have to leave my home, I will go ______________________________ (Decide this even if you don’t think there will be a next time). If I cannot go to the location above, then I can go to ___________________________________________.
I can also teach some of these strategies to some/all of my children.
When I expect we are going to have an argument, I will try to move to a space that is lowest risk, such as _________________________________ ( Try to avoid arguments in the bathroom, garage, kitchen, near weapons, or in rooms without access to an outside door).
I will use my judgment and intuition. If the situation is very serious, I can give my partner what he/she wants to calm him/her down. I have to protect myself until I/we are out of danger.
Step 2 Safety When Preparing To Leave
I can use some or all the following strategies:
I will leave money and an extra set of keys with _______________________ so that I can leave quickly.
I will keep copies of important papers and documents or an extra set of keys at __________________________________________.
I will open a savings account by _________________________________, to increase my independence.
Other things I can do to increase my independence include:
The domestic violence program’s hotline telephone number is _________________________ and I can seek shelter by calling this hotline.
I can keep change for phone calls on me at all times. I understand that if I use my telephone credit card, the following month the telephone bill will tell my batterer those numbers that I called after I left. To keep my telephone communications confidential, I must either use coins or I might get a friend to permit me to use their telephone credit card for a limited time when I first leave.
I will check with _______________________________________and _______________________________________to see who would be able to let me stay with them or lend me some money in an emergency.
I can leave extra clothes with _______________________________________.
I will sit down and review my safety plan every _________________________ in order to plan the safest way to leave the residence.
_____________________________________ (domestic violence advocate/friend) has agreed to help me review this plan.
I will rehearse my escape plan and, as appropriate, practice it with my children.
Step 3 Safety in My Own Residence
I can change the locks on my doors and windows as soon as possible.
I can replace wooden doors with steel/metal doors.
I can install security systems including additional locks, window bars, poles to wedge against doors, an electronic system, etc.
I can purchase rope ladders to be used for escape from second floor windows.
I can install smoke detectors and fire extinguishers for each floor in my house/apartment.
I can install an outside lighting system that lights up when a person is coming close to my house.
I will teach my children how to use the telephone to make a collect call to me and to _______________________ (friend/family) in the event that my partner takes the children.
I will tell people who take care of my children which people have permission to pick up my children and that my partner is not permitted to do so. The people I will inform about pick-up permission include:
________________________________________(School)
________________________________________(Day Care Staff)
________________________________________(Babysitter)
________________________________________(Sunday School Teacher)
________________________________________(Teacher)
________________________________________( )
________________________________________( )
I can inform _________________________________________, and _______________________________________(neighbors), ________________________(pastor), and they should call police if he/she is observed near my residence.
Step 4 Safety With an Order of Protection
I will keep my protection order ____________________________________(location) (Always keep it on or near your person. If you change purses, that’s the first thing that should go in).
I will give my protection order to police departments in the communities where I usually visit family or friends and in the community where I live and work.
I can call local domestic violence programs if I have questions or if I have some problem with my protection order.
I will inform my employer, my minister, my closest friend, my relatives, and _________________________________________ and _________________________ that I have a protection order.
If my partner destroys my protection order, I can get another copy from the court clerk where they order was issued.
If my partner violates the protection order, I can call the police and report the violation, contact my attorney, call my advocate, and/or advise the court of the violation.
If the police do not help, I can contact my advocate or attorney and will file a complaint with the chief of the police for that department.
Step 5 Safety on the Job and in Public
I can inform my boss, the security supervisor and ____________________ at work about my situation.
I can ask _________________________________ to help screen my telephone calls at work.
When leaving work, I can ________________________________________.
When driving home if problems occur, I can ______________________________.
If I use public transit, I can ___________________________________________.
I will go to different grocery stores and shopping malls to conduct my business and shop at hours that are different than those when residing with my batterer partner.
I can use a different bank and take care of my banking at hours different than those I used when residing with my batterer partner.
I can also _____________________________________________________________.
Step 6 Safety and Drug or Alcohol Use
If I am going to use, I can do so in a safe place and with people who understand the risk of violence and are committed to my safety.
I can also _______________________________________________.
If my partner is using, I can __________________________________________.
I might also ___________________________________________________.
To safeguard my children, I might ___________________________________ and ___________________________________.
Step 7 Safety and My Emotional Health
If I feel down and ready to return to a potentially abusive situation, I can ________________________________________.
When I have to communicate with my partner in person or by telephone, I can __________________________________________.
I can try to use “I can…” statements with myself and to be assertive with others.
I can tell myself- “__________________________________________________________-“ whenever I feel others are trying to control or abuse me.
I can read ________________________________________ to help me feel stronger.
I can call ___________________________________ and ____________________ as other resources to be of support of me.
Other things I can do to help me feel stronger are _______________________________.
I can attend workshops and support groups at the domestic violence program or ____________________________________, or _______________________________ to gain support and strengthen my relationship with other people.
Step 8 When I Leave, I Should
- Identification for myself
- Children’s birth certificate
- My birth certificate
- Social Security Cards
- School and vaccination records
- Money
- Checkbook, ATM card, credit cards
- Keys
- Driver’s license
- Medication
- Paperwork/Documents
- Medical records
- Lease/Rental agreement, house deed
- Bank books
- Small saleable objects
- Address book, pictures, jewelry
- Children’s favorite toy, book, blanket
- Items of special sentimental value
Telephone numbers I need to know: Advocate ____________________Counselor ____________________Local Police ____________________Crisis Line ____________________Shelter ____________________ Work number ____________________Supervisor’s home ____________________Minister ____________________ I will keep this document in a safe place and out of the reach of my potential attacker. Review date ____________________